Kir Royal

Kir is a popular French cocktail made with a measure of crème de cassis (blackcurrant liqueur) topped up with white wine.
In France it is usually drunk as an apéritif before a meal or snack. Originally the wine used was Bourgogne Aligoté, a lesser white wine of Burgundy. Nowadays, various white wines are used throughout France, according to the region and the whim of the barkeeper. Many prefer a white Chardonnay-based Burgundy, such as Chablis.
Originally called blanc-cassis, the drink is now named after Félix Kir (1876 - 1968), mayor of Dijon in Burgundy, who as a pioneer of the twinning movement in the aftermath of the Second World War popularized the drink by offering it at receptions to visiting delegations. Besides treating his international guests well, he was also promoting two vital economic products of the region. Kir initially allowed one of Dijon's producers of crème de cassis to use his name, but subsequently extended the right to their competitors as well. According to Rolland (2004), [1] the reinvention of blanc-cassis (post 1945) was necessitated by the German Army's confiscation of all the local red Burgundy during the war. Faced with an excess of white wine, Kir renovated a drink that previously was made primarily with the red.
Following the commercial development of crème de cassis in 1841 the cocktail became a popular regional café drink, but has since become inextricably linked internationally with the name of Mayor Kir. When ordering a kir, waiters in France sometimes ask whether you want it made with crème de cassis (black currant), de mûre (blackberry) or de pèche (peach).
The International Bartenders Association gives a recipe using 1/10 crème de cassis, but French sources typically specify more; 19th century recipes for blanc-cassis recommended 1/3 crème de cassis, and modern sources typically about 1/5. Replacing the crème de cassis with blackcurrant syrup is deprecated[2].



SIDENOTE:
ilike this... Makes my throat quench... cheers for kir royal...

I'm definitely LOVING my BLOG...

3 posts in one day... Addiction, this is...

...and ACTUALLy, THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE TITLE UP THERE...

This is about the what-so-called "ANGELIC LOVE..."

For some reason, people deal with something with an unknown result. But later in the end, they just find theirselves crying. Hanging. Waiting for that someone to come back.

Of course, we can't preclude our tears when they feel to roll down. Worse, we can't veil the pain especially when it's about the heart- the heart that tears apart, the heart that shouts, the heart that reminds us that once, we've been enamored with someone. In times like these, people tend to be depressed, gloomy or even empty. But just like other mouth speaks, feeling bare is better than being too much hurt.

Life isn't always about the solitary side. Sometimes, this loneliness is just a way to have a happier one. Open a better-off door.Enjoy life. And please, don't trap your shadows in a nightmare. Letting go is just a part of our existence. Learn to unleash. Accept the reality- the reality that even you win that person back, you couldn't have him whole. Don't waste your chance to delve into other scraps of life. Remember, you're young and smart.
You are special. If not for him, atleast for us.

Better think about this my dear... *_*

... It's because I blog!

http://www.paulsadowski.com/Numbers.asp

Thanks JOEMAR for sharing this site.
I felt extremely encouraged to pursue my personality out of this.
*falling confetti*

You entered: Aprilyn Delos Reyes Pasumbal
There are 25 letters in your name.
Those 25 letters total to 109
There are 9 vowels and 16 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 1

The characteristics of #1 are: Initiating action, pioneering, leading, independent, attaining, individual.

The expression or destiny for #1:
A number 1 Expression denotes the skilled executive with keen administrative capabilities. You must develop the capacity to be a fine leader, sales executive, or promoter. You have the tools to become an original person with a creative approach to problem solving, and a penchant for initiating action. Someone may have to follow behind you to handle the details, but you know how to get things going and make things happen. You have a good mind and the ability to use it for your advancement. Because of these factors, you have much potential for achievement and financial rewards. Frequently, this expression belongs to one running a business or striving to achieve a level of accomplishment on ones talents and efforts. You have little need for much supervision, preferring to act on your own with little restraint. You are both ambitious and determined. Self-confident and self-reliant must be yours, as you develop a strong unyielding will and the courage of your convictions.

Although you fear loneliness, you want to be left alone. You fear routine and being in a rut. You often jump the gun because you are afraid of being left behind.

The negative attributes of the 1 Expression are egotism and a self-centered approach to life. This is an aggressive number and if it is over-emphasized it is very hard to live with. You do not have to be overly aggressive to fulfill your destiny. The 1 has a natural instinct to dominate and to be the boss; adhering to the concept of being number One. Again, you do not have to dominate and destroy in order to lead and manage.

Your Soul Urge number is: 9

A Soul Urge number of 9 means:
With a 9 Soul Urge, you want to give to others, usually in a humanitarian or philanthropic manner. You are highly motivated to give friendship, affection and love. And you are generous in giving of your knowledge and experience. You have very sharing urges, and you are likely to have a great deal to share. Your concern for others makes you a very sympathetic and generous person with a sensitive and compassionate nature.

You are able to view life in very broad and intuitive terms. You often express high ideals and an inspirational approach to life. If you are able to fully realize the potential of your motivation, you will be a very self-sacrificing person who is able to give freely without being concerned about any return or reward.

As with all human beings, you are prone to sometimes express the negative attitudes inherent to your Soul Urges. You may become too sensitive and tend to express emotions strongly at times. There can be significant conflict between higher aims and personal ambitions. You may resent the idea of giving all of the time and, in fact, if there is too much 9 energy in your nature you may reject the idea. You may often be disappointed in the lack of perfection in yourself and others.

Your Inner Dream number is: 1

An Inner Dream number of 1 means:
You dream of being a leader and one who is in charge. You want to be known for your courage, daring, and original ideas. You seek unconquered heights. People may get a first impression that you are very aggressive and sure of yourself.


Side note:
Well YES. I was... I am. :) I will be. :P

"To see a world in a grain of sand
and heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand
and eternity in an hour."

TEAM BREAKFAST @ Langhap Sarap...

...and the rest is HISTORY. :)
MUGS up for a GOOD MORNING!

This place calls my heart...

10 Random Things I Have In Mind Right Now

Well, my shift is over for this day. And I think sleeping is not my plan as of this moment. Actually, I was browsing my facebook while I realized something. I want to do things. Honestly, I don't even know if those things are possible...

There are 10 random things in my mind right now...

1. I want to be a model. I know... It's kinda humorous. Popularity... Money... and ofcourse, every dress I might want to wear...I know, I may not have that perfect body and face to show off, but yeah, a little confi factor and discipline would at least make that daydream into reality. So thumbs up to that! :)

2. I want to learn how to play piano and guitar. Actually, I have my guitar. When I was 18, I asked my Inay to buy 1 for me as a gift. Laugh at it, but 'til now, I don't still know how to play it. And piano, YES, definitely, it would be a great achievement if I might have the chance to play it. I don't know... Everytime I see a girl playing piano, I am amazed... If only I have the chance to learn...

3. I want to have my own fine dining restaurant. Absolutely YES. I don't know anything about business management,and I just know a little about cooking--(pastas, etc.). I don't have enough money to invest on it...but once I've given the chance to have one, I would definitely make something out of it. Really SOMETHING. It maybe hundred percent impossible as of now, but who knows? MAYBE TOMORROW. :)

4. I want to have my own DANCE STUDIO. It has been my passion to dance. You may not know that I know how to...am I right? Well, actually it just started wayback highschool. I just tried to audition for extra curricular just to skip attending P.E. classes. And HURRAY for me, it's an approve for the school's dance instructor. After that, I learned more about dancing. I even experienced to dance on other schools like La Salle, La Co.,etc. And yes, I told myself... I'm loving it. Though, the past years of college seems so busy that I almost forgot how to. And now, ewan ko lang kung magkakacareer pa ko sa pagsayaw. Malay ko...

5. I want to travel tourist places here in the Philippines. Ofcourse, before I explore the world, Pilipinas muna. Actually, I have lists of places I want to go to. First in my list is Amanpulo, they said it's so expensive to go there. I wonder, siguro talagang maganda don, noh? :) Well,next is Palawan. I want to take pictures of those places na sa magazine ko lang at sa google ko lang nakikita. Scroll down to my list, you'll find CEBU, BOHOL, experience festival @ BACOLOD, BANAUE, SORSOGON, ANTIQUE,SOUTH COTABATO, PANGASINAN...and more. Dami noh?

6. I want to travel the WORLD. I have HOPES. Bakit hindi? I know my mom would be glad if she would know this. I know, she had dreams for me. Sayang nga lang at wala na siya. Taga-cheer ko sana siya kung nagkataon... AnyHOW, first in my list--ASIA. Tapos, AFRICA. TAPOS, EUROPE. Impossible as it may seem, pero all prayers are answered...in any way. Right?

7. I want to give SMILES to HOMELESS children. I am a human who enjoys material things. I buy what I want not thinking if there's enough left for tomorrow. You might call me gastador but there's one thing I'm proud about myself--I may not be rich but I never doubt to share. When I turned 19, I promised myself that I will never turn 20 without doing anything. I told myself that once that I have the chance or enough money, I would but goods and kindly distribute to some beggars. I did it. 'Twas when my father gave me money(a week after my birthday). I went to BASILICA to give those plastics of noodles and canned goods. It feels so good to put smiles on people specially to those you don't even know. And their simple way of saying SALAMAT is a heart warming payback for me. Natawa ako dun sa matanda na binigyan ko, di ko makakalimutan yun. Sabi nya, "Salamat iha...kahit matagal pa ang eleksyon..." Di na ko umimik. Ngumiti na lang ako...

8. I want to learn different LANGUAGES. Hmmm. Realmente, sé un pequeño de español... y quiero aprender más... Et juste un peu de français... Un po' di italiano... And alot of English...haha. Other than that every f-lang that i know was to just basics.

9. I want to be married at the age of 27. Exactly! At the age of 27, when things are into its proper places. I don't want to see myself at this age-married, having kids, and unsettled. Correct, I have my job now but my salary isn't enough to satisfy a family. If you'll ask me if it satisfy mine, i doubt for a clear answer. I just need to strive harder for greater opportunities.

10. I want to be a writer. I may not know every rules in writing, there might be alot of... I might have errors but one thing is for sure... What I write comes not from my mind, It's from my heart.

BOTTOMLINE:
Nothing. :) I just want to share these things before it slip off my mind.

HAVE a great cup of coffee everyone. Good Morning Philippines!

A Heartfelt Experience

This is one of the heart warming experiences I have in my LIFE... I was once taught that courtesy and respect are one of those highlights of EDUCATION. I certainly agree that not all of us has been nourished greatly in school but ofcourse we have our homes as our first place of learning.

So why still lack of respect and courteousness to the oldies?

So let me tell you my experience to let you feel what I've felt...

I was on my way home and I simply took an ordinary fare bus to reduce my transpo fee. I sat on the right side of the bus where the window was half opened. On my left side was an old man sitting comfortably while having his legs crossed streched forward. He was wearing glasses. And his hands and his voice were both shaking.

Then suddenly came a kinda 35-year-old conductor. He asked the old man his destination and immediately gave him a ticket. As I look at the old man, he is puzzled of the amount punched at the ticket.

"Utoy, senior...", he said with a trembling voice, pointing the ticket to him.

Then, I felt bad towards the reply of that sarcastic conductor. He said in a high tone voice,

"Tssk... Eh hindi naman kayo nagsasabing senior. Kung kailan nabutasan na ang ticket saka kayo magsasabi. Simpleng pag-imik lang eh, hindi pa magawa."

I felt pity. He was looking at his ticket together with the 20 pesos and coins he have in his hands. He was puzzled on how to pay the fare with his unsufficient money.
After I had paid my fare, I didn't keep my purse back in my bag 'cause I was thinking that the old man might ask for an addition to complete his fare. And YES, I am willing to give.

The conductor then came back to get his fare,

"Sa susunod ho, iimik kayo, para SENIOR lang ang sasabihin e...",he said harshly taking the uncomplete payment.

I really don't get it. Is there really a need for the old man to tell the conductor that he is a senior? It's absurd, right? It is obvious. God gave us eyes to see. Because certainly, there are things that we don't have to explain because it is seen barely by our EYES. And in this experience, it's proven.

I wonder why that conductor treated an old man like that. Oldies need to be respected because at their age, even they lack of hearing and seeing, they are more sensitive. Because they use their hearts instead of senses.

And having his situation, I came into a thinking. How if we change the situation? How if the old man is someone popular? Or to exagge, a celebrity? Would he still treat that old man that way? I guess not.

I shared this story to let you know and feel the way I did. Respect is the most important thing you could ever give to the oldies. Because they might not be educated that much but by experience, they have more than what we know.

And because I grew up with my grandparents, I so dedicate this post for you.

"Inay and Tatay, thank you for making me feel loved and cared. I love you both!"

BOTTOMLINE:

PAY RESPECT to oldies. Have in mind that time will come that we will be just looking at the mirror reflecting like them. Love them like your own.

Goodnight everyone.

"Is the glass half empty or half full?"

~the pessimistic approach would be to pick half empty, while the optimistic approach would choose half full.

Pessimism, from the Latin pessimus (worst), is a state of mind in which one perceives life negatively. Value judgments may vary dramatically between individuals, even when judgments of fact are undisputed. The most common example of this phenomenon is the "Is the glass half empty or half full?" situation. The degree in which situations like these are evaluated as something good or something bad can be described in terms of one's optimism or pessimism respectively. Throughout history, the pessimistic disposition has had effects on all major areas of thinking[1].

Philosophical pessimism is the similar but not identical idea that life has a negative value, or that this world is as bad as it could possibly be. It has also been noted by many philosophers that pessimism is not a disposition as the term commonly connotes. Instead, it is a cogent philosophy that directly challenges the notion of progress and what may be considered the faith-based claims of optimism.

I might be pessimist right now, but I swear... TOMORROW would be an OPTIMISTIC DAY for me... Note it!


BOTTOMLINE:
I may not be the person you like... But I'm certain that I am the person that many people LOVED...

ask GOD, and He will give you two THUMBS UP.

SUNDAY SADNESS

YES. I am bored.

I really want to go out today. Like the old days, sundays are the best of my weeks.

I could still remember, I usually go out with my friends-go malling after a sermon with the parish priest. Otherwise, go to LIPA with family-eat out,watch movie with my siblings, bonding time with my father and ofcourse my loving step mom.

Idk, perhaps, there is something wrong about me now. It feels so strange waking up late with a headache, sitting here a my desk, my eyes focused at the laptop,lost appetite, just BLOGGING.

COOL. Is this really the feeling of being out of the teen years? I don't feel anything good now. What's wrong?

But...
Yes, exactly! Maybe I need just a little talk with HIM.
I guess, He's just waiting for me to approach.
It's been so long since i had a petit talk with HIM.
and yeah, it's been so long as well since I stepped in the CHURCH to preach.

Well, HEAVENLY DAD... I'm so sorry. I know, work and alot of things poured my mind that I never realized that something is missing. 'Twas you who stayed beside me 'til the end. YOu never left me. Thank you for all the blessings, either small or bounty. I miss u... I love uuu...

and ofcourse the BOTTOMLINE:
~> have a small talk with HIM.
He's just waiting for you...
(:

LET GO AND FORGET

Well, I know...

A lot of people who knows me might read this and they would perhaps say what do i know about such words as LET GO and FORGET? It may sound easy as drinking a coffee, but it would be a miles different if you drink that coffee straightly when it's extremely hot. And yes, insanity that is...


As we all know, letting go and forgetting are two different words that goes together everytime we get hurt. We actually feel frustration everytime we let go of the things that we hold on tightly. These are sometimes the things that we've always wanted for so long.

Just like a kid crying over a toy in a store. Imagine how he put grip on an remote controlled airplaine he saw just then. Some moms would buy it just for the kid to stop crying... but take note, some will not.

Well, i have experienced that though, everyone saw me crying out loud,lying on the floor holding that precious doll i've really wanted but i think hindi ata effective ang pagiging emotera ko nung bata ako, the doll wasn't bought for me. Pero after all, after a week of playing with my mates with lutu-lutuan and bahay-bahayan, i FORGOT about the doll i cried for. Nonesense, right?

I have a lot in mind right now, maybe crying and depression is just an initial reaction of our mind and heart when we try to let go and forget of such things. Again, i know... It's never an easy thing, but learning it by process will definitely push us to something really great.

SIDENOTE:
Never let yourself be stucked!
Learn to FORGIVE and FORGET...
Well, if you've committed a mistake, just be SORRY and have a bit of change.
Having a hot chocolate after getting soaked up in the rain is the best for me.

LOVE YOURSELF. LIVE. LOVE. GOD.

and this GOES with a BOTTOMLINE:
~> i actually have two words for you.

MOVE ON.

OH YEAH! I'm Out Of The Teenage Years...

I just turned 20, and honestly, I don't feel anything significant about it. It's just the same besides that I’m out of the teen age years.

My nineteenth year was really something. I started it with a self promise of being submissive to INAY and PAPA to which had resulted to a GRADUATION el grande from college life. After a moment,I entered into a sweet and subtle relationship- without even foreseeing the doubts of "what will be" and "how will it gonna be". I was inlove and passionately being loved by a STRANGER. I gambled and tried my luck- hoping that my soul-less heart will be able to appreciate the same affection, AGAIN. But just like any other stories, my own vision of entrusting my necrotic heart to someone changed. I became selfish and resilient. We fought, we clashed and what's the best was, we end up hoping that doors might open for us in other way around. We still hold each other's PROMISE, and we know that along the way, we'll be able to find more felicity that we've always wanted.

That year taught me how to become a highbrow person. To be a real achiever, i guess, a SMART choice should always be considered. 2009 was not the best year but it was way different from the other. I'd been into different places, mingled with new faces and independently made decisions about everything. I finished my studies, celebrated holidays and blew candles with my loved ones- satisfying reasons why i should be thankful enough.

AND FOR THE SIDE NOTE: Random thoughts this '10

Trips. 1st whatever. Shopping. Beach. TELETECH. LOVE. FAMILY. Holidays. And more.

And as the saying goes, always beat your BEST. I will.

After a drink HEADACHE...

Ah YES! APRIL's still HERE.

I've been loaded with everything these past few weeks. My scheds were all tight- No time to bond with friends, to visit my relatives, to atleast dine out with my papa dear, to treat myself to salon, bla bla blas.. Funny though, I wasn't able to do those simple things when in fact, I WAS AVAILABLE on weekends.

What happened to me? NOTHING. What has changed? MANY.

1. I have graduated the training for product and it was worth the efforts. It has been three free months since I moved away from home.

2. Im turning 20, and I don’t still know if that will be jolly-oh-so-happy day. I don’t have any idea of what will be happening on that “supposed-to-be” HAPPY BEERDAY.

3. I am planning to cut my hair short but was hesitating. I might not want it after the haircut, so nevermind.

4.I am missing my INAY dear. I was supposed to go home every weekend but I turned out to go home every payday. EAting out with INAY with a shopping galore is a relaxing part of working(for me).

5. I was eating a lot now, I found happiness from the food I eat. YEY! YUmm.



And this goes to the BOTTOMLINE:

"I just wanted to say a big HELLO to everybody."

WRAP IT OUT!

...I'm into something NEW.

My frustration is GONE, or shall I say, is a BIG-DEAL-NO-MORE for now. I've seen two, atleast.

Soon, I'll be a busy maggot again so I wanna take some pause before the nonstop demands of being a CSR, lover, friend, a sister to anyone and a germ to others (if you happened to be infected, just kill yourself alright?. kiddin. ;p). CHILL guys, CHILL WITH ME! :)

Yeah, im into something NEW, that is... TO THINK OF ANOTHER FRUSTRATION.. yahoooo!!

Btw, do you know my favorite color? ;p haha.
This is the effect of being an easy-go-lucky for a month.
Thank you.

Ketcup and Mayonaise

Bessy(rachel): Kuya, pahingi namang ketchup... Damihan mo ha?..

Mcdo Crew: Osige po, saglit lang.

(suddenly, dumating un crew may dalang 5 ketchup)

Mcdo Crew: Ok na po Maam?

Bessy(rachel): Kuya... Ikaw talaga, sabi ko marami, di na makarequest eh... Dali na naman... Mga 10 pa...

McDo Crew: Hindi nga po?...(napatawa naman yung crew)

Bessy(rachel): OO.. 10 hah... Salamat...

(bumalik ang crew dala ang 10 ketchup...at umalis agad ng walang pasabi)

Bessy(april): Ano, okay na? Sisinukin ka na sa ketchup nian eh... Puro lycopene na laman ng katawan mo...

Bessy(rachel): Sobra ka naman bessy, ano... ikaw naman.. dali,

Bessy(april): Anong ako naman?

Bessy(rachel): Ikaw naman ang humingi ng ketchup...

Bessy(april): Ano?! Grabe ka... para 2large na fries lang toh...

Bessy(rachel): Dali na naman...

Bessy(april): Oo na... Sya sige! (tumawag ng panibagong crew)

Crew2: Ano po un...?

Bessy(april):Kuya, parequest naman ng 20 ketchup... Naglilihi lang tong bestfriend ko... Please...

Crew2: Maam, ang dami po masyado... Baka po masita ako...

Bessy(april):Ok lang yan, kahit dalhin mo palima-lima...

Crew2: Sige po maam, ittry ko po...

(dumating ung crew... gling sa iba't ibang bulsa, kinuha nia ang 30 na ketchup...)

Astig noh...(Well, about the Mayonaise...ako may favorite non, hehe)

Well, I miss those times... We always eat out... Anywhere we want... We disregard how much it cost as long as we are having fun... We might have days when we don't have any coin in our pockets, but we still have fun... Actually, we share our deep dark secrets... And it will stay as it is... Forever...

Dear Bessy... (I hope you may have the chance to read this),

How's doing? I miss everything about us..

our talks...

our unmeasurable laughs...

our bonding time (singing and dancing together)...

our pajama parties...

our crazy stories...

our timeless jokes...

our GABRIELA days...(rawr!)

and alot more...

We cried together, we had problems... We live... We laugh... We get separated but still we end up holding each other's hands... I could still remember those nights we sleep together, we fell asleep hugging each other and woke up just the same... (: Those days were irreplaceable...

I hope, we could still have time to see each other... We might have our own job... Time will come that we'll have our baskets full of fruits that we reaped from our own hardworks, and sharing it with you would be the best part of it. We are separated by miles, but always bare in mind that you always occupy a big space in my heart... I super duper miss you. And I so love you no matter what. Even the world go against us, I'll stay beside you. Some people might not understand us the way we act and react on some things, but the most important thing is we understand each other no matter what.

Bessy, I want you to know that I am always here for you, may problema man o wala...

I love you...

I miss you...

IT'S US... FOREVER....

Your loving bessy,

ApZ

THE ART of FEAR

Now Playing...
[The Remedy by Jason Mraz]

"...I say the tragedy is how you're gonna spend
The rest of your nights with the light on
So shine the lights on your friends
When it all amounts to nothing in the end...
I won't worry my life away...2x"

Yeah... This is the song I'm playing right now... And yes, I kept on playing it unconciously while in the bus on my way home from work. While looking outside,as trees and houses passes by,my mind was overflowing of so many random thoughts. Amazing that I came up with an interesting one. I was thinking about FEAR and how to deal with it.


FEAR
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
for other uses, see fear (disambiguation)

Fear is an emotional response to a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism occuring in response to specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger.


So fear, therefore is something we feel towards a thing we are afraid of. Everyone knows fear, but some only knows how to trade with it. I know what fear is... but I'm uncertain how to overwhelm it. I have boxes of it, and I know we have some things in common.

For me, FEAR is/are:

~> spiders and cockroaches (including all crawling organisms)
~> heights
~> crossing streets(specially on highways)
~> ghosts, wiccas, witchcrafts and pagan cults, etc.(well, it's situational...)
~> assessments/examinations (specially when I find the subject too complicated e.g. MATH, CHEMISTRY, PHYSICS and everything that is indeed to be memorized) heck!
~> criticism
~> falling madly in love...(then get dumped)
~>death
~> saying GOODBYE to someone whom you expected to stay for life
~> well, lastly... Ofcourse, GOD.



What's at stake?


Spiders... Cockroaches... Worms... Unidentified Crawling Organism(U.C.O.)... and alot more. Well, who likes it? If you do, I don't know if you're thinking just fine. Perhaps, consult a doctor.(Just Kidding! :) ) Yeah, not all but most of us are hating these creatures. Are we forever jumping in fear everytime we see one? We should not. It's quite easy, get your largest slipper and (...you know what to do next). Have a bit courage to do it, anyway you are a hundred times bigger than it. And besides, if you get used to doing it, the FEAR isn't there anymore. You'll be seeing yourself triumphant of getting over the thing you are scared of. Suddenly you'll realized that the FEAR you have before was now turned into something called COURAGE.

Heights...
Roller coaster, bungee jumping, parachutes, hang gliding... and everything that relates to heights... Yes, I'm afraid of it... It's like a bit next to danger. And the word "what if" starts to make up my FEAR. Like, "What if the rope breaks?" , "What if I landed badly?"or the scariest of all... "What if I die?" Would I still feel the JOY that the others felt when they tried it? I don't think so. Somehow, I'm thinking of trying it but definitely NOT now. Seeing videoclips of it makes me even feel the FEAR. But as I see overflowing with tears of JOY once they overcome it, I'm CURIOUS to try.

Crossing streets...
Don't laugh! :) I know, it's funny that a 19 year old lady finds it scary to cross the street. It's kinda hard to reveal it, though. But what I'm really scared of, is ofcourse, not the street-- but the cars and ten-wheeler trucks that passes. Again, there is the DANGER and overcoming it means alot. When I eventually crossed the other side, it's like a SUCCESS for me. Cheers! :)

Ghosts, Wiccas, Witchcrafts...etc.
Goosebumps...haha! Like those that you see in movies(e.g. sadako, exorcism of emily rose, the grudge, the white ladies, and more). I'm not a child anymore but it doesn't mean that there's an exception on what to feel. I'm afraid of that but as long as I haven't seen one, it will forever be just an art of my wild imaginations. There is one thing that I do before diving the bed-- I pray. And it takes the FEAR away.

Examinations...
Yes, I fear assessments and even evaluations. Why? In every test, there is a an unacceptable thing called MISTAKE, unless you got PERFECT.
I am not PERFECT. And committing MISTAKES for me is something I absolutely fear of. For every mistake comes with a consequence.
How can I deal with it?
BE PREPARED...because even intellects have their own weak points.

Criticism...
Critics are words we avoid to hear from people that are ahead of us. We might not want to hear or know bad things that they see about us. But acknowledging or learning it gives you a room to IMPROVE. I fear it. Possibly, because I hate to disappoint myself. Like, when I thought that I was doing great but for others, it was'nt good enough. It leads to frustration specially when I tried a couple of times and ended up with nothing. One thing to do is keep on trying. STRIVE for the best. If you feel like giving up, take a pause but never STOP. Because if you do, you are more likely to be called as LOSER.

Falling madly in love...(then get dumped)
Oh, I hate this... Spell O.U.C.H.-- that explains it. O-ounce of bitterness... U-unconcious falling of tears... C-cohesive suicidal attempt... H-hates to starve...
Yes... I know, overcoming it is hard. But CLOCK is moving,so as you should.

Death...
I don't want to die. I'm not ready yet. But it is a fact, that in time,destiny will come to bring us to it's bed. We may FEAR, deny for now, bargain, or even pretend we don't know it but ACCEPTANCE is always at the end. Right?

Saying GOODBYE to someone we expect to stay for life.
It's just easy. People do come and go. You can never dictate one to stay as long as you want, because we are created to make our own stories for us to see how the world works for us. It's hard to say goodbye. Seeing the person walk away is the most painful part. But have we thought that GOODBYES are really not forever? We are just acting over the distance that abides on a period of time.

GOD...
Precisely... No further explanation.



That's it...


For me... Fear comes with the things that we eventually learn as we grow up. Come to think of a child... so pure and innocent... He don't know the word PRETEND. That explains the reason why when he gets HURT, he CRIES. That is his way of showing how he got hurt. So why hide the tears if you feel the hurt? Sometimes, crying eases the pain...

To sum up everything I said, LIFE is something which deals with:


*HURT*PAIN*TEARS*LEARNING*FEAR*HOPE*LoVE*HAPPINESS*

I'm starting to deal with it...
HOw about you?
*

A Good Start!

11/07/2010 07:39pm

Pardz.warren



"Haha. pumasok k dw tmrw. un ang sbi."



It was my second week at work, first work after graduating at college to be precise. Yes, everyday since my application is a fear and joy combined. FEAR that I may not be able to accomplish well every task that was given to me, and JOY, for overcoming it once in a while. One question that keeps running in my mind was-



"Bakit ba lagi ako inuunahan ng kaba? E sa huli natatapos ko din naman ng maayos..."



I don't know why. And yes, it is normal to humans to react in everything that happens. I just don't get it why I feel that way every day. How am I supposed to overcome it? maybe I can get used to it someday. SOMEDAY.



Today is a tranquil Sunday. I am here, sitting in front of the laptop, trying to type every word that comes out of my mind. And definitely, it feels good. As we all know, talking directly to someone and writing down what you feel is very different. In talking to someone, we might hold our tongue to something we don't want to say, while in writing down what we want, everything comes out. Well, going back to what I am trying to say, it is a peaceful sunday night right now. A while ago, I received a text message from a friend/co-worker. I asked him if I passed the call simulation. Yeah, at first I was hesitating to open the message but I really have to, just to find out. And he said,



" Haha. pumasok k dw tmrw. un ang sbi."



I get it. I made it! I passed the mid-assessment and the call simulation. After that, I was thinking. What's next? Here's that different heart beat again. Like an automatic ticking of the clock. Perhaps, I just have to DEAL with this. I know I can do this like everybody does. Probably, If the person don't know me yet, he might say I am overreacting. He might say I can just do it easily but I'm just acting like I don't know how to. But he's definitely wrong.



I grew up experiencing things while nobody cares to support me. In my whole life, nobody has said. "Go April, I know you can do it." Or might as well ask, "Do you want it? Go for it, I'm just at your back." Maybe this kind of feeling just started since the day I found out that nobody cares if I'm the best or I'm the loser.



Yes, despite of those things, I still made it. Even nobody believes in me. Even nobody cares. Because there is one thing I'm absolutely sure of. That there is someone UP there, that though He is not physically present, I can still connect to Him through prayers. And I can see Him whispering back through the great things that happens to me every single day. (: